[ Contents | Search | Post | Reply | Next | Previous | Up ]
From: Alan (to Eireann)
Date: 19 Oct 2009
Time: 13:56:43 -0500
Remote Name: 81.77.82.99
Hi Eireann, Thank you, so much, for taking the time to read my paper and provide feedback. It’s always heartening to receive comments from a student SLP. I think it’s to our mutual benefit when we interact in this manner. Yes, it is only during recent years that I have come to understand what drove and perpetuated my stuttering behaviours. I simply didn’t realise how avoidance strategies had insidiously crept into my life; I wasn’t aware of the disempowering beliefs that I held. While it’s pleasing to learn that your 11 year old client claims he is not bothered by his stuttering, I’m not particularly surprised. Looking back, I feel that I was possibly in a similar situation at that age. Having progressed through infants and junior schools (I’m not sure what terminology you use in the US education system) with the same nucleus of classmates (and teachers) since the age of 3 or 4, I was totally at ease in their presence. In effect, it became a huge comfort zone. Although I received speech therapy from an early age, I do not recall any major problems until I entered the grammar school (your high school?) at the age of 11 years 9 months. I have vivid memories of struggling to give my name and address at the in initial registration in front of a 100 new pupils I had not previously met. I did not have the same comfortable relationship with my new teachers – they were distant and less understanding. Reading aloud in class was a nightmare. I would calculate 10 desks ahead the passages that I was going to have to read, realising that they contained many words that I convinced myself I could not say. When the reading eventually came to me, I would opt out and it would pass onto the next pupil. I never asked, nor responded to questions in class for fear of looking a fool. It was SOOOOOOOOOOO frustrating. When we avoid a word or situation, the fear level in respect of that word/situation increases – it grows and grows. We strengthen that fear, we create a stronger emotional charge - we give it greater power over us. In view of the limited time at my disposal, I wonder if I may (at this point) refer you to my earlier responses to Julie (two posts on October 10) and Kristina C (one post on October 15), as they specifically relate to children and embrace some of the points that you raise. Let me conclude by saying that as I moved into adolescence and adulthood, I became much more aware of the way in which my stutter was impacting upon my life. Employment can become an issue. My career as a police officer was tainted by a catalogue of heartache and lost opportunities – I was never able to fulfil my potential because of the communication difficulties that I encountered. Eireann, I hope that you will find something of interest in my reply. I wish you every success with your studies and in your work with your 11 year old client. Kindest regards Alan