[ Contents | Search | Post | Reply | Next | Previous | Up ]
From: Pam
Date: 13 Oct 2009
Time: 15:01:52 -0500
Remote Name: 163.153.6.70
Jacqui, Well, the answer to your question is actually very a long one. Essentially, what made me decide that I'd had had enough was getting fired from a job because of stuttering. I felt all the usual emotions when one is fired (and I had been employed at the same place for over 20 years). But I also felt guilt. Maybe it wouldn;t have happened if I had been upfront about my stuttering, instead of trying to hide it, cover it up, deny, mnake excuses. I felt in some way it was my fault becasue I wasn't being authentic. That "breaking point" propelled me to seek help and come out of the covert stuttering closet I felt trapped in. I wrote about this whole experience on last year's ISAD conference. http://www.mnsu.edu/comdis/isad11/papers/mertz11.html Please feel free to look at it. . . . . I was ready anyway. I was looking for a way to come clean,a nd be true to myself. The way found me. Being fired from my long time job, which actually enabled me to remain covert, was probably the best thing that could have happened. Not everyone has extreme defining moments like this, but I even remember the exact time on that day when I was told. It rocked my world and changed my life.