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We have advantages when it comes to public speaking

From: Alan Badmington
Date: 20 Oct 2010
Time: 09:00:56 -0500
Remote Name: 95.144.71.232

Comments

Hi Harry, Thank you for sharing your story – it was informative, inspirational and extremely poignant. Having stuttered since childhood, it was inevitable that speaking in front of groups figured prominently among my list of fears. A catalogue of painful experiences, accumulated throughout my life, had fuelled my belief that I could never successfully perform that role. If we fail to confront our disempowering beliefs, they can imprison us. I admired (and had dreams of emulating) those who appeared at ease in front of an audience. Yet, I always shunned public speaking, justifying my avoidance by the fact that I stuttered. In 2000, I plucked up the courage to join the Association of Speakers Clubs (ASC) - which has its origins in Toastmasters International. I didn’t just join one club, I secured membership of THREE. :-) A half a century of stuttering provided me with the motivation to sample the experience of addressing an audience. I yearned to become a public speaker. I submit that persons who stutter have several advantages when entering the field of public speaking. Over the years, my struggles with the spoken word encouraged me to cultivate useful writing skills. In many instances, transferring my thoughts to paper was the only effective way in which I could meaningfully express myself. The written option allowed me to communicate exactly what I wanted to say. I could select words without the usual anticipatory fear associated with stuttering. My past oral exchanges were littered with words that I considered to be inferior or, in some cases, totally inappropriate. I succumbed to mediocrity simply because I did not want the listener to see/hear me stutter. Habitual use of word substitution meant that I amassed an extensive and varied vocabulary. My literary dexterity, coupled with the ability to tap into my over-flowing word reservoir, proved invaluable when I needed to write my own speeches, contributing immensely to the success that I have since enjoyed since becoming involved in public speaking. Your ISAD paper, and your thoughtful/detailed responses to those who have participated in the threaded discussion, clearly indicate that you have acquired a wonderful vocabulary, as well a delightful way of expressing yourself – so, I guess we both had a head start on others. :-) Ironically, I no longer find time to attend ASC meetings because of the hectic schedule of public speaking engagements that I fulfil. My diary of commitments already extends well into 2012. :-) Harry, I urge you to consider following a similar path. One of the talks in my current repertoire involves a 60 minutes, humorous, tongue-in-cheek look at growing older. Tomorrow evening, I am due to speak to a group of senior citizens. I will tell them (inter alia), “You’re never too old to set a new goal. It’s never too late to become the person you’ve always wanted to be. I didn’t enter the field of public speaking until I was in my 60’s. Just imagine, all those wasted years when I could have been addressing delightful audiences such as you” :-) Thomas Edison wrote: "If we did all the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves." I, wholeheartedly, agree. For so many years, I was oblivious to my true potential - sacrificing my aspirations for the false illusion of comfort and safety. When I took charge of my thoughts, and systematically exposed myself to risks, I created the perfect antidote for the debilitating effects of fear and self-doubt. Like you, during recent years I have achieved things that, for most of my life, I considered impossible. Public speaking has now become an integral and exciting part of my life. Stepping outside my comfort zone, and treading less familiar paths, has greatly enhanced my existence. Harry, I recall that you wrote to me shortly after having attended my ‘Comfort Zone’ workshop at the British Stammering Association annual conference in Telford in 2006. You said that you had already derived benefit from challenging yourself on a daily basis. It’s more than obvious that you have continued to explore uncharted waters, dealing with whatever ripples that have occurred. :-) Personal development occurs when we venture beyond our existing comfort zones. It requires re-drawing our mental maps so that we increase the size of our familiar areas. When we feel the discomfort, we know that we are confronting the fear. It confirms that we are taking risks. If you are not feeling uncomfortable, then you need to push yourself more. Like the turtle, you can only move forward when you stick your neck out. The only limitations are those that we impose upon ourselves. The success we achieve will be proportionate to the risks we take; we become increasingly powerful as our lives expand to accommodate more experiences. As our power increases, so does our confidence in our own ability. We find it easier to continue the process of stretching our comfort zones, in spite of any fears that we may experience. I certainly found that I became more adventurous as time progressed, the magnitude of the risks expanding correspondingly. When we achieve something that we, hitherto, regarded impossible, it causes us to reconsider our limiting beliefs. If we conquer something that has challenged our advancement, we grow in stature. When we overcome hurdles, it opens our eyes to possibilities that we could never have imagined. When we are stretched by a new experience, we likewise grow as human beings. Harry, keep being true to yourself; keep seeking out challenges; keep living your dreams and KEEP TALKING! :-) Kindest regards Alan


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