[ Contents | Search | Post | Reply | Next | Previous | Up ]
From: Pam
Date: 21 Oct 2010
Time: 22:55:59 -0500
Remote Name: 67.248.218.106
Hi Elizabeth,thanks for the comments and very insightful questions. I think both men and women can be great communicators, fluent or not. I think what I have learned as a woman who stutters is that communication is so much more than fluency. When I finally realized that how I communicate is so much more than just what comes out of my mouth, I coupled that with the screaming desire inside me to go ahead and let myself be heard. I can stutter and be a wonderful communicator, because it is about connecting, speaking with emotion and allowing the listener in, instead of me being so focused on trying not to stutter...... As for feeling less feminine because of stuttering, absolutely. I felt for a long time that my stuttering added to the reasons why I felt I was unattractive to others, especially men. I fell into believing the stereotype that women are supposed to be care-givers and the ones to nurture. I also doubted my ability to do that if I couldn't "talk right". I think women who stutter do indeed equate their femininity and attractiveness to perceived ability to communicate well. Several women I have chatted with (and they are on some of the podcasts, not just the ones linked here), disclosed that they felt "not whole". I did too, for a long time. So, yes, I think its part of the unique aspect of women and stuttering. And you are right . . . when we cycle and our hormones all over the place, and we feel tension, of course that tension affects our speech patterns. One of the women featured on an episode was a biologist and researcher, and has indeed studied that. I always felt less confident at some times during the month, and of course confidence levels affects speech. To me, its fascinating, as it what has come spilling out from just merely asking women to share their stories. I hope as a grad student that you can take the time to listen to some of the episodes. These amazing women of all ages, with unique stuttering patterns, on all different parts of the journey, can all teach us so much about the richness of life! ~Pam