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From: Alan Badmington (Part 2) :-)
Date: 21 Oct 2011
Time: 05:30:14 -0500
Remote Name: 95.144.69.225
In my initial post, I wrote “Each time we relive a successful occurrence it reaffirms what we have achieved. In fact, research has shown that bringing such incidents back into our consciousness serves to strengthen that positive memory.” In view of this, I wondered if clients are encouraged to talk/write about their successful experiences. I have benefited immensely from sharing my stories/challenges over the years, via online discussion groups/support groups and forums such as this. Relating those incidents has had a very powerful impact upon me. Each time I relived a successful incident, it reaffirmed what I had achieved. I genuinely believe that my progress has been helped considerably by the fact that I have been able to tell myself (and others) about the positive experiences I have enjoyed. Some people may be of the opinion (and it’s their prerogative to think whatever they choose) that speaking about one’s successes is egotistical. Well, I happen to hold an opposing view. That has certainly not been my motivation for sharing. It’s simply that re-living the successful episodes strengthens my memories of those events. When we savour and foster positive experiences, it intensifies our positive responses to them. The longer something is held in our awareness, the more emotionally stimulating it becomes. Since early childhood, my stuttering was fuelled and perpetuated by the difficulties, setbacks, pain and catalogue of lost opportunities that I encountered. For over half a century, I constantly reminded myself of what I could NOT do, or the dire consequences of attempting to speak in certain situations. I spent a lifetime accumulating, recounting and giving far too much prominence to the memories of negative speaking experiences. As a result, my stutter flourished and thrived. The more I nourished and sustained it, the more it impacted upon my daily existence. I make no excuse for having reversed that trait. In direct contrast, I now constantly remind myself of my successes. I truly believe that you should never shirk from telling yourself how much you have achieved. I would welcome your comments. Kindest regards Alan