[ Contents | Search | Next | Previous | Up ]
From: Lynne Shields
Date: 12 Oct 2012
Time: 16:35:37 -0500
Remote Name: 86.163.102.46
Hi Katie, You have asked some very important questions related to handling teasing and bullying. There are some really fine pieces on teasing and bullying and how to handle it on The Stuttering Homepage as well as in the archived previous ISAD conferences. I would encourage you to search there to find more information. Search for information from Bill Murphy, Scott Yaruss, Nina Reeves, and Marilyn Langevin, just to name a few. My basic take on this is to work with the child or adult to find out what is happening and how that makes them feel, and then begin to help the client sort out what they would like to change about the events and feelings. I come at the issue from several directions. First, I would like the person to be able to see that the person who bullies is the cause of the problem, not the person who stutters. I want the client to see that they did not cause the bullying because they stutter---they just happen to stutter and the person who is bullying them has the problem. This is often a quite new way for someone who stutters to look at the situation. Second, I would like to see the client figure out ways to respond to teasing or bullying so that they feel empowered rather than victimized. Identifying how they currently respond to bullying is often a first step, followed by analyzing how those responses work out and make them feel, followed by brainstorming new ways to respond that they want to try to substitute for their old responses. The client can try out some of the new responses, evaluate the outcome, and make changes if desired. There is no easy fix for teasing and bullying, but with some guided effort, children and adults can learn to react to such situations in ways that allow them the freedom to stand up for themselves and not accept blame or feel bad when someone tries to intimidate them. Your second question relates to whether or not you should tell the parents of a child that he/she is being bullied if they ask you not to do so. If you have a relationship of trust with a child, it is important to honor their wishes if at all possible. That being said, if there is concern that the bully might act on threats to hurt the child or has already hurt the child, then reporting it to the proper school administrator is likely important, as well as the child's parents. An SLP working in a school setting talk must become aware of the school (or district) policy on reporting bullying of any kind. That will inform the SLP how to proceed in the case of a child revealing an incident of bullying. Others may have a better answer for you. Since I work in a university clinic, parents typically bring their children to therapy sessions and often observe, so they are likely to learn about bullying if a child shares this with me or a student clinician. I encourage open talk between the child and their parents about stuttering; that sort of openness may take some time to establish, but it is important in helping a child manage their stuttering and the associated issues (like bullying) and the family in supporting their child. Regards, Lynne