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From: Lynne Shields
Date: 12 Oct 2012
Time: 13:39:49 -0500
Remote Name: 86.163.102.46
Dear Danielle, An affirming statement is basically identifying a specific behavior that a person has demonstrated and letting them know that you see it as a positive thing. All of us, at least at times, find it hard to see our own positive accomplishments; it can help for someone else to notice it (out loud). So, for example, if a child accomplishes the goal that he or she set for the previous week, I might say, "I see that you met your goal to raise your hand and talk in class. I'm proud that you did it". Or, in therapy, if a client has an 'ahah' moment, you might affirm them by saying, "You just told me that when you give yourself a few moments to think about what you want to say, you feel less stress about talking. That tells me that you are really thinking about how to manage your speech." Start looking for opportunities where someone you know (a friend, family member, roommate, etc.) does something positive and see if you can identify it verbally ("I noticed that you...") and then tell them what that says to you about them ("That tells me that you think about others a lot"). It is a great exercise and gives you a nice bonus in that you'll begin to find it easier to do this, both in your personal life and in treatment. Best regards, Lynne