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From: Ellen-Marie Silverman
Date: 20 Oct 2012
Time: 10:24:21 -0500
Remote Name: 76.228.192.184
[[Thank you for your insightful paper. Your 'Rescue Triangle" is great. Occasionally I find, however, that that 'victim' role is representative of how my client lives his/her life, and my counseling skills are inadequate....what criteria do you use to determine when you need to consult with/refer to other professionals?]] >>> Hello, Sheree. Nice to meet you! Well, Sheree, my answer to your question about the criteria I might use to determine whether or not my readiness to help a client may sound a little glib because you only have the words in front of you that I typed into this webpage and can't see or hear my nonverbals, including the tone of my voice. But let me assure you what I have to say is entirely sincere: If I don't feel able to help a client based on what I perceive to be his or her needs and his or her stated goals because of my limited knowledge or skills or personal (mine) inclination, I state that as soon as I believe that to be true and follow that up immediately with what I hope to be suitable referrals that may help that client or potential client find the help they may need at the time. >>> As you may know, the process of determining whether or not we may be able to provide the help a particular individual is seeking begins right at the outset, during evaluation, and continues throughout the professional relationship. What may have seemed like a good match between what we have to offer as a clinician and what the client seems to need at the outset can change during the course of a relationship as more information is revealed and as we experience the flow of life, so to speak. So our potential for providing suitable guidance is something we continually monitor. >>> Let me add, if you will, Sheree, something you also may already know and that is none of us as professionals can meet the needs of every client or would-be client so we need not experience any sense of failure by recognizing that truth. What we can do when we detect we are not the one to provide the help someone needs is to recognize we are doing our job and doing it well by holding the needs of the client paramount by saying "No" and refuse to become what, otherwise, could be an obstacle to their growth. >>> Thank you so much for this thoughtful question. I hope I have given you some support for continuing to move in what seems to be a productive direction as you establish your career. Ellen-Marie Silverman