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From: Scott
Date: 06 Oct 2012
Time: 07:38:37 -0500
Remote Name: 108.17.124.241
Hi Annette - Thanks for your post. You're absolutely right - it can be terrifying for a parent to find out (or have their fears confirmed) that their child stutters...or exhibits any communication disorder. There are several things that I think we can do in such a situation. The first is to recognize that it's completely normal and acceptable for parents to have such reactions. We can help to validate their feelings of anxiety and grief, so they can process them. Just because a person feels an emotion does not mean that we need to try to help them stop feeling that emotion, but often speech-language pathologists get a bit nervous when their clients/parents are feeling negative emotions. We can let them feel them, validate them, support them, let them know that what they are feeling is normal and understandable. This will help them process those emotions and move to "the other side," where they are better able to deal with the issues. Second, I think it's very helpful for parents to get support for coping with their child's stuttering (and their own reactions to the stuttering). We advocate connecting parents with self-help organizations such as the National Stuttering Association and Friends. Through these organizations, they can meet many other parents of children who stutter. This helps them see that they're "not alone" in facing stuttering - and that there is hope for the future. Hope is a tremendously powerful experience, and one that everybody should be familiar with. Having hope doesn't mean that the parent is dwelling on the notion that child will necessarily stop stuttering; it means that the parent is open to a future in which the child is able to communicate effectively and live a normal, healthy life. Fluency may be part of this, but there are so many other things that contribute to a parent's hopefulness about the future for a child. Talking with other parents can help parents regain their hope, and this can be a life-altering experience. Years ago, Nina and wrote a booklet for the National Stuttering Association aimed specifically at giving the parents the knowledge and support they need to begin to work through their emotions - and to have the hope that they need for their child's future. It's available on the NSA's website (www.WeStutter.org). It supplements booklets from other organizations such as the Stuttering Foundation (www.StutteringHelp.org) that provide important educational foundations for parents. Helping parents experience and work through their emotions, and giving them support through the difficult times, can go a long way toward helping them regain their hope for the future. There is much more to be said, obviously, but these are two important first steps. (Other steps include working with a skilled speech-language pathologist, of course ;-). Hoping this helps. Thanks again for your post! Scott