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From: Paul
Date: 10/9/02
Time: 2:00:03 PM
Remote Name: 193.217.179.238
Writing for myself (Liv wants to answer this separately from her own perspective), these are my thoughts on this "touchy" subject:
Liv and I began to communicate by E-mail in mid-January 2000, and we first met in person on April 28 of that year. During this period of over three months, we were in almost daily contact with each other, with sometimes very lengthy E-mails. We had told each other virtually our entire life stories, as well as many deep thoughts and reflections from within our hearts and souls. Our writings also included selections of poetry. Liv translated some of her favorite Norwegian love poems for me, and I wrote special love music for Liv and sent it to her on a cassette.
After about a month of E-mailing (and following Liv's surprising marriage proposal), we added telephone conversations, overseas snail mail packages (including photos), and Instant Messaging conversations by computer.
By the time we met in person, I felt that I really knew Liv far more intimately than I had known any girlfriend during my long 46-year bachelorhood. As the result of all our E-mailings and our other communications, there were really no surprises left. I felt I knew Liv inside and out (and I believe that Liv will probably say something similar when she writes her reply to these questions). I knew not only her complete life story, but also was confident that I knew the innermost feelings of her heart, the deepest thoughts within her mind, and the beautiful core of her soul. Externally, I knew what she looked like, and had talked to her by phone, and so there were no surprises here either. There were also no surprises with regard to personality - we had communicated in so many ways that I felt I really knew what she was like as a person.
As revealed in Liv's last posting, she was the one who proposed. I, with a little more caution, waited until we met in person before accepting. But then it only took me a week to say "yes" (and I said "ja" five months later). I was both excited and nervous while driving the four hours or so from Massachusetts to the Newark, New Jersey airport where I first met Liv in person. Some of my friends thought I was taking a great gamble in meeting this woman whom I had met on-line - and some even strongly warned me not to do it, believing that it was highly probable that the "real-life" Liv could not possibly measure up to the "ideal" Liv I had been communicating with on-line. But I remained confident, bolstered by an inner feeling from all our communications that this was my true "beshert" (a Yiddish word meaning one's destined lovemate, perhaps chosen by divine hand). That Liv could turn out differently than expected after all these deep communications was something that was not in my consciousness - the possibility was just too remote for me to even consider. It is true that I was the one to hold out on accepting a marriage proposal, but in waiting to meet Liv in person, I was simply following the surface suggestion of my brain, rather than listening to the more profound messages being given out by my heart and soul. Within a week, my brain, heart, and soul were in agreement, and Liv and I became engaged. - Paul