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From: Brett Kluetz
Date: 10/4/02
Time: 11:28:23 AM
Remote Name: 136.142.43.21
Rhonda, Thanks for your post. It's interesting that you related to this article when your daughter has been diagnosed with apraxia of speech. I can see where you made the connection re: encouraging your daughter early on to be a confident communicator.
I must admit, apraxia or developmental dyspraxia is not my area of expertise. Therefore, I can answer your question based on how I would encourage children who stutter to become more confident communicators. It sounds like there are similarities in that your daughter waits for you to fill in her words and can "shut down" when she's frustrated with talking.
One way to encourage your daughter is to give her lots of positive reinforcement. For example, when she asks for something or tells you a story, you might say: "I love listening to your stories" or "I liked how you asked for __." You may also want to indicate that you have time to sit down and listen to her and that there's no rush.
Also with children who stutter, I think it's important to be open about their difficulties with talking. Even at 5-years-old, it's a good idea to validate the child's frustrations (e.g., "yes, sometimes you get stuck and that makes you feel__). It sounds like you could validate your daughter's frustrations when she "shuts down" and talk about it with her. Your family might even want to talk with her about the fact that people may ask her to repeat her words sometimes. In my opinion, the bottom-line to get across at least for kids who stutter is that "it's no big deal that your speech is different." Kids who stutter and kids with apraxia of speech can be in speech therapy and still feel like it's okay how they speak and that they are accepted. That is, their speech isn't "bad;" it's just different. Once a kid starts to think, "my speech is bad," s/he will undoubtedly shut down and not want to talk because s/he will feel ashamed.
One way to show that it's okay to not have perfect speech is to provide appropriate speech models. That is, you might want to make the effort to speak more slowly (if you speak rapidly)and pause between words and even repeat words sometimes. This may show your daughter that she doesn't have to follow a perfect model of speech, which is difficult for her.
Also, I would assess whether any family members interrupt her or finish her sentences or barrage her with questions. This can sometimes be frustrating for kids who stutter and I'm sure it is similar for some kids who have apraxia of speech. If she feels like people are listening and accepting her, she will most likely feel more comfortable communicating.
Finally, I think you can show her that talking can be fun by for example, speaking with her about what you're doing, reading stories and having her finish parts of the story if she wants. You can show her that talking can be fun and without judgement.
Having said this, I wouldn't overemphasize speech and I would also focus on other activities that your daughter enjoys (such as paiting, dancing, sports etc.). That is, she may find that even though talking can be difficult sometimes, she finds drawing or bike-riding to be easy. This will hopefully help her to feel good about herself and take away some of the pressures of speech.
These are just some suggestions I would give to parents who have children who are starting to stutter. It's difficult to fully comment on your situation because I don't know the details of your daughters' diagnosis and what she's doing in speech therapy. But the point to highlight is that you can encourage her to feel good about communicating. In my view the key is to be accepting and open about her speech. But this doesn't mean that she can't still work on improving her speech with her therapist.
I hope these suggestions have been somewhat helpful. I would also suggest, if you haven't done so already, that you look at some of the websites on apraxia of speech (also called developmental dyspraxia) and see if it's possible to even speak with other parents.
Sincerely,
Brett Kluetz