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From: Derek E. Daniels
Date: 10/19/03
Time: 5:07:48 PM
Remote Name: 152.163.253.33
Dear A. Alvarez,
I think the question you pose, “Is stuttering the most devastating illness for a man?” is a question that doesn’t really have an answer. First, as Russ Hicks stated, we don’t think of stuttering as an illness. I think of it a multi-layered experience. Also, I think that parallels exist among experiences such as stuttering, deafness, blindness, being in a wheel-chair, and so forth, but comparing these experiences is like comparing apples and picture frames. They are way too different to be ordered on the same scale.
First, stuttering is too variable. One person who stutters may think that his or her stuttering is the worst experience, while another person may not think twice about it. The way we feel about ourselves and our stuttering is largely dependent upon both how others perceive us, and how we react to those perceptions.
Second, pain is pain, no matter what form it comes in: a three-year old loses a pet, a person who is wheel-chair bound wants to walk, a 40 year old loses a parent, a mother loses a child, a blind person longs to see, a child is never told that he or she is loved. As “outsiders” to these experiences, we may think that it’s possible to arrange them from “greatest to least”. However, the person walking in those shoes will tell you that each is painful in its own way. I think we can get into some serious problems when trying to rank order people’s pain and experiences. Saying that one experience is “more devastating” inevitably marginalizes the other.
I think it’s important to really focus on the experience before us, and how we can improve it to have a better quality of life. There’s nothing wrong with recognizing parallels in other people’s experiences, but each is different and unique in its own way.
Derek E. Daniels, Bowling Green State University