Passing As Fluent

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Correct reply to  Derek!

From: Terry Dartnall
Date: 10/20/03
Time: 4:36:54 AM
Remote Name: 132.234.9.79

Comments

(This supercedes my previous reply to Derek, which contained typos and was generally garbled.)

Hi Derek (and Steve – I hope you’re there as well)

Thanks for your sensitive and insightful mail.

You say, “I had worn a mask for so long that no one really knew what I looked like – not even me.”

I’ve been thinking about something along these lines recently, so let me try to articulate it. Overt stammerers say that we should “come out” and “stop hiding” and “be honest about our stammers.” I don’t know whether you are on the STUTT-L email list, but there’s been a lot of debate about this recently. Coverts feel uncomfortable about coming out and ask why they should openly stammer when they can pass as fluent most of the time.

I wonder if there is a confusion here. What the overts mean by “coming out” is that we should stop hiding our stammers. We should openly stammer. But – hey! – we are NOT overt stammerers! We have a good deal of fluency! Why can’t we “come out” by admitting that we are COVERT STAMMERERS? That would take some of the pressure off the emotional pressure-cooker without requiring us to openly stammer. And it relates to your question about identity. Who are you? Well, you’re a covert stammerer! Can’t that be your identity? We’re not normal speakers, but we’re not overt stammerers either.

You say, “In stuttering communities, we are the ones who ‘never stutter’, yet in settings where everyone speaks fluent, we are sweating to the end to not stutter. This is the double-edged sword to being a ‘covert stutterer’.”

Can we turn this on its head? Can we see ourselves as stutterers who CAN pass as fluent? That would mean that we would have to accept ourselves for what we are - covert stammerers! Wouldn’t it be admirable if we could do that? I just wonder if the solution isn’t right under our noses – too close to us to be within arm’s reach.

“I am now a speech-language pathologists and writer, thanks to my experiences. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

What do you write about? Do you write fiction? How would we write fiction about the inner turmoil of the covert stammerer – our brother or sister, or the boy or girl next door? Why does that seem like such a very hard thing to do?

Good luck with the doctorate. Get in there, shoot the thing, and get out as fast as you can! And don’t try to solve the world!

Terry


Last changed: September 12, 2005