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From: Judy Kuster
Date: 10/8/03
Time: 11:09:11 AM
Remote Name: 134.29.3.133
This is my attempt at putting into English what Raf is trying to say:
I find your iceberg analogy to stuttering to be excellent. I provides an idea about what stuttering is like. In my life I have two passions - to explain "why" and to understand my "iceberg." I have explored this iceberg - and you have enlightened me a lot. The heart (center), the emotions that are unmentionable, is good. The mind, the images, the ideas of the mind are at times, tricks and false. I have used your information like a compass. It provides good insight into the mental images and memories that are the way to understanding. It is a long and difficult job, but with time, the feelings under the surface can improve.
I know what my iceberg is made of, how it started and the inner workings which are very deep under the surface. I have discovered one that surprised me. In honor of using analogies, it is like a pressure cooker or a boiling pot. I have removed the cover and is lets escape uncontrollable desperation, pity and pain. In the bottom of the pot is a dark figure, a figure behind a mirror, for which I don't even have an exact name. If we continue, I believe you will understand because it is the cause. The origin. The symptoms can vary, but they reflect a single cause. The stutter is a symptom. It is a reflection that the mind uses to relieve the tension, but it is also a logical consequence of the situation that has been created. The mind has made the iceberg. The stutterer needs to stutter. The mind creates guilt. There is nothing else than the stutter. The stutterer has in his heart, desperation. With understanding, the symptom (stuttering) will diminish. The stutterer is forced to speak, but struggles. In order to improve it is necessary to unveil the image behind the mirror. To recover, the image behind the mirror must live and speak. I am still working on that last goal. I'm sorry if my images are vague and my explanation is long and complicated.
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To summarize - Raf likes your analogy. She also says she has one of her own - a boiling pot that she has tried to keep covered. When she lifts the lid, a lot of bad feeling come to the surface. The stuttering is a symptom of the tension she has in trying to keep the lid on. She says that at the bottom of the pot is something that hidden, but it is the basis of her problems, and it is what is hidden and under the surface is what she needs to deal with if she is ever going to diminish the symptom of stuttering.