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From: John Harrison
Date: 11 Oct 2006
Time: 03:45:10 -0500
Remote Name: 71.135.107.221
....YOU SAY -- By rewarding the effort, no matter the result, it conditions you to make the attempt again. As you said, it encourages the person to take charge. I think this idea of tangible rewards is one that can be extended into intervention. Are there any specific examples that you have had success with? ......I SAY: -- You really got it, Katia. That's EXACTLY what I'm trying to get across. One of the big areas in my life in which this way of thinking has has had a significant impact on me has beenin the area of regrets for what I did or didn't do. I used to replay over and over again what I did "wrong", trying unsuccessfully to make it come out better (which of course I could never do). Now I simply ask myself two questions -- (1) what was my intention, and (2) did I follow my intention? If the answer is yes to both of them, then no matter what the result, I find a way to reward myself for following my intention. This has the effect of INSTANTLY cutting off my self-talk, something I haven't been able to do for most of my life. Wow, has this been effective!!! I also find that I'm more willing to project myself into any speaking situation 100% and speak more powerfully, because I am focusing on my intentions, rather than my results. I've stopped obcessing on what people might be thinking, but rather, focusing on my intentions and using that to drive my actions. This has made me a lot bolder in what I'm willing to try. This is precisely the mindset that you want to encourage in any intervention. It calls for encouraging the individual to place their highest values on following their intentions, rather than obcessing on what kind of reaction they're getting from others. People who stutter are almost always focused on pleasing everyone else but themselves. This is another way of saying that they give away their power. So it calls for lots and lots of reinforcement before they can build enough confidence to start giving that up..and empower themselves. Thanks so much for your comments. Regards, John