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From: Tim Mackesey
Date: 11 Oct 2006
Time: 19:17:50 -0500
Remote Name: 72.145.253.179
Everything works better if we get the parents goals up front. I call this the mission statement. I ask parents to write answers to 1)How specificall do you want your child to speak, 2) Describe the self-esteem you want to help develop within your child, 3) Why are these things improtant to you? When they are acting in a reactive way that is agianst THEIR outcome, I use it as talking points to reframe them. Being in private practice gives me more leverage. I tell difficult parents that I advocate for their child. They pay me but I am working for their child and his future. I have been know to call parents to speak candidly when the child is not present. Eliciting an outcome and compliance from them before we start is priceless. In sales they have the "take-away." In therapy- when we have a real difficult parent- we have "I'm not convinced I can work with you to help your child." Let them scramble to convince you. Cheers, Tim