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From: John Tetnowski
Date: 16 Oct 2006
Time: 15:46:07 -0500
Remote Name: 134.29.31.173
Tony, I agree with you. I think feeling better about yourself is indeed a great way to go.....however, I see little reason for you to need much of it (confidence, self-esteem, etc.). You are not "full of yourself". You have had a successful career and should be proud of it. I know I would be proud if my daughter achieved your level of success. However, people like us, have incredibly high expectations for ourselves. I think discussing this with people who are close to you is a great exercise that can really help. Since we were talking about children, let me give you an example from my life. When my daughter was born, I reacted in a way that I thought was appropriate. After all, I had seen my father and other males in my life react the same way. My personal reaction to being a father was to WORK MORE! After several months of this, my wife complained to me that I was never home. I remember telling her, "What else do you want me to do? I am working three jobs to make sure that you and our daughter have enough money to have all the things that we want!" Her response was, "We don't want your money.....all we want is you!". Unfortunately, for people like us, we can never be GOOD ENOUGH. However, honest and opened-discussions with people around us may be the key to being satisfied. When you say you want to be better with your stuttering and its symptoms....I might ask you why? And for whom? You may have already answered part of the question already. Just knowing that you (and I know myself, as well) have incredibly high expectations of yourself may be a step in the right direction. Looking at the world in this fashion MAY help. I am not going to ask you to change your life goals or your expectations. However, take the time to write down what you really want as your goals for your speech. You may have already met your goals. But putting them in writing may get them "closer for you to grasp". Good luck! (but you probably don't need luck....your talent will probably carry you!) John Tetnowski