Helping Children Deal with Teasing and Bullying

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Re: Reaction and questions pertaining to your article "Helping Ch...

From: Marilyn
Date: 10/9/01
Time: 8:05:23 PM
Remote Name: 65.29.28.137

Comments

Dear Jodie: I am glad that you have found the article helpful. Regarding your questions:

1. The teasing and bullying program was initially designed for grades 4 – 6. In our field testing, 3rd grade children in split * classes also participated very successfully. Schools are using the program in various ways – if you read my comments to Jaan Pill , you get an idea of how it is being used.

2. You can request an order form or run one off from the teasing and bullying website at www.tab.ualberta.ca Please know that the cost of $75.00 Canadian is cost recovery and all proceeds go directly to our treatment and training programs.

3. Re: parents refusing to follow through with the home exercises. If a parent refuses there may not be much that can be done from the parent perspective. Here are some ideas that you may well have tried already:

(a) try to learn why the parent is not following through. There may be many reasons. One possibility might be that there are some philosophical differences and the parent espouses different strategies. I sometimes find that when a person has had an opportunity to share their opinions which differ without judgement or alternatives suggested by me as a listener, they sometimes become more open to that to which they were initially closed. I think it is important to allow choice and believe that fear sometimes underlies a closed response. I am careful to respect different philosophies and would make it clear that in the code of behaviour may differ from that at home and it is important for the child to learn the code of behaviour that operates at school.

(b) if the parent continues to not follow through, perhaps setting up a buddy system for the child in which an older student or another adult in the school helps the child work through the parent/home exercises may help. In this case I think it is important to be objective with the child and indicate that the code of behaviour in school may differ from that in their home or other parts of their life and that is okay, but it is important that they understand what is acceptable and not acceptable at school and that they get practice with solving problems.

I hope this is helpful and thank you for posting your comments. Sincerely, Marilyn


Last changed: September 12, 2005