destiny

DESTINY

by Jim Abbott

Words, simple little words
Words others say so effortlessly
Same words I can't say
At least not fluently
No matter how I try
And always I have wondered why
Why my tongue is so tied yet my words can run free
But I need not your pity
Nor sympathy
For my friends, you see
Nor sympathy
For my friends, you see
It has occurred to me
That this is just
My destiny

Back in school, don't be a fool, don't raise your hand
Dammit I know the answer
But I can't take the chance
Don't say a word
You don't wanna embarrass yourself again
That's right
I can't embarrass myself again, I won't embarrass myself again
I just won't talk anymore
No, that won't work
I've tried that before
Every night on my knees I plead
I ask of GOD or the powers that be
Please end my suffering
Please set me free
Why is this
My destiny

Angry, hateful, filled with rage
I'm some kind of freak I belong in a cage
Stay in my room where I can be who I want
Where no one will snicker
Where no one will taunt
Growing up is hard
Must I stutter as well
Must this childhood of mine be a nightmarish Hell
Is there anyone out there to answer my call
Is there anyone out there
Anyone at all
Please, please take this vile curse from me
Must this be
My destiny

The years fly by and in the blink of an eye
I'm all grown up
With children to raise and bills to pay and you know what?
I made it
I survived
That childhood Hell which I knew so well
Is but a memory
I survived
Yes, somehow I survived

I not only have survived but somehow I have thrived
I survived

I still stutter
I know I always will
But the pain is gone
The anger is too
For finally have I realized words are not my enemy
And stuttered speech is not my curse
It was just
My destiny


added with permission of the author
June 17, 2000